9.18.2002

Not worrying about when I can slip away for a cigarette seems to be good for my inner peace. Who knew?

Also, at the dentists office today I learned that people that smoke and have diabetes are twice as likely to lose their teeth and that bad dental health can ruin a lot of different organs in your body. You can actually suck bacteria into your lungs if you have periodontis or something like that. Ack! Bacteria lung disease! Eek! No thanks. Also: I haven't had my teeth cleaned in about 5 million years. May I now tell the general public (i.e. the three of you that read this) never ever do this. When a person denies regular dental visits the dentist will break out the Sears Performance Tools upon said persons next visit.

Todays tool was the jigsaw. Handy in any crafting crisis, this marvelous tool can also cut through plaque, tartar, and gums at an amazing speed. Thankfully, I am now plaque free but I seem to be suffering from eternal bloodloss. One can only hope I won't slowly bleed to death as my reward for trying to correct my dental don'ts.

And this isn't the end of the cleaning saga, oh no. Due to my rude departure from dental cares, I need two cleanings, not one. So I go back in Ocotober but Cassandra the Jigsaw Psycho promises next time won't hurt as much. And then! Dun dun duuuuuuuun! I get to bleach! My teeth are going to blind people! Shannon will walk up to me and say, "What's up, fool?!" and I'll smile and *BAM!*, before I can even say, "Yo!", she'll be out cold, electrified by my lightning white smile.

Ooooh yeah. I feel good.

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