3.27.2014

#SOL14 - Why Kindness Matters


We have no way of predicting when our time with loved ones will end. In our biggest dreams, we have years and years to spend with family, create our masterpieces, weave together the legacy we leave behind. In our unspoken fears, we know there are no promises that guarantee us anything more than this moment.

Today I went to a memorial service for a friend's mother.

He lost her last weekend, due to a terrible car accident that took the lives of both people involved.

Last night, my brother-in-law lost a cherished grandfather.

Just over a week or so ago, my oldest son was involved in an accident with a motorcyclist that, thankfully, ended without any major injuries. Still, this one small moment in my son's life has rattled him deeply; a huge reminder for a boy barely in his twenties that he is not invincible.

Each incident a reminder to make daily choices to fill my life with gratitude and compassion, to make time for people and not fill my days with the busy trivial things that somehow tend to wedge in and become a sponge soaking up all the minutes in a day.

In the past year I have felt a sharp need to say no at work more than I say yes, to give myself more time for family and my own interests. The television is never on anymore at night, there is more time for conversation, I work hard (so hard) at being completely present with the Littles -- paying attention to their games, playing with them, having discussions, and leaving my distracting iPhone unattended so they get all of me, and not just a woman half involved. I'm back in school, working on what I love, even though logic would have sent me on a different path. The pressure to follow my heart seems to matter more and more than following the prescribed career path I began many years ago.

Time is fleeting. Focusing on kindness -- to myself, to everyone around me -- is where I find my solace in the face of so many uncertainties.

5 comments:

  1. This piece is so honest and important. I am sorry for all the loss that has surrounded you lately. You have certainly received an important lesson from it--thanks for sharing it with all of us!

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  2. Loss is like that, an unfortunate harsh reality wake up to the joys we live with every day. I just found your slices for the first time. Love this happy place. Hope you keep it up after March is through.

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    1. Thanks, Margaret! I'm hoping to do the A to Z challenge in April. Or Camp NaNoWriMo. Winging it! Either way, I'll be writing!

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  3. Sweetheart,

    I know that this isn't the correct forum, but I need to talk to you.

    Dad

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  4. Thanks for this important reminder. So glad to hear that there are some people that are actually setting down their phones and computers and being fully present in their kids' lives.

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