Today, we ramble (otherwise known as: today we procrastinate because the writing of my current work in progress is not exactly what one might call progress.)
It's the Ides of March! If you've been here a while, you'll recall that last year I explained how much I hearts the Ides. So I won't drag you through all that again. You can read it here, for those of you desiring extra me today. (Please look over the fact that I am definitely not throwing an Ides of March party this year, as predicted. But I am going to see a friend for dinner, so that's one step in the right direction, yes?)
Whilst celebrating the Ides on FaceBook, I came up with the idea that we should all be slinging out Shakespearean insults today. I mean, the Ides of March isn't exactly about sunshine and puppies, right?
So, for your viewing pleasure, some of the more interesting insults I found while perusing Ye Olde Internets:
Henry IV - Part 2You scullion! You rampallian! You fustilarian! I’ll tickle your catastrophe! (What does this even mean, Will??)
Henry IV - Part 1Peace, ye fat guts! (I imagine this being said in the manner we use Peace! today, like Peace out, homes!)
Thou art as fat as butter. (This one just seems uninspired. Maybe the speaker was feeling hungry?)
As You Like ItYour brain is as dry as the remainder biscuit after voyage. (Ha! Please, oh please, give me a time to use this.)There you have it. Henceforth, The Ides of March will be known as the day you can be rude and get away with it, because if it was good enough for Shakespeare, it's good enough for us!
In other news, I just had this conversation with The Husband:
Me: Do you know what today is!?
Him: Umm... the... March... 15th?
Me: Yes! And do you know what March 15th is?!
Him: Umm... it's... National Writing Day? Poetry Day??
Me: You just threw together a bunch of things you know I like!
Him: (laughing) Well, was I right?
Me: No! It's the Ides of March!
Him: What's that?
Me: (walking off, completely destroyed) We're not even married anymore.
And now friends, you've seen my loves of things called Ides, insults, and how strange and wonderful my relationship with The Husband is. This seems like a good time for me to exit, stage right!