7.01.2002

Alone in the house again and still trying to get used to the sounds of night. The silence is interesting, I actually prefer it over music or tv, which I usually have going just for background noise.

I wasn't ready for sleep, even though my head hurts and my eyes are watering. Silly thing, that.

So I thought, "What a lovely time to update my Amazon wishlist."

This would have been an excellent idea could I have found any way to get my password for said endeavor. Instead, I had to make an entirely new wishlist. I went a little bonkers. I found the Target store. And much, much more. I figured since I'm new to this home, why not look for things to fill it with. And music! And books! And movies, oh the movies. I'm not certain that playing with wishlist ideas after midnight is a great thing, but it passed the time all the same.

Of course, time I could have been finishing my book, or sleeping, even, but what can you do?

Today my mother told me her troubles with moving into the new house lie (lay?) in the fact that she enjoys a high class of living and I am no longer providing her with that. I tried not to cry, let her go back to the other house to sleep (again, as she hasn't finished packing), and looked around the new place. I love my living room. I love the colours and the atmosphere. I love the floor. I love the windows. I love that it is small and cozy, and whenever you are sitting in it with other people, you feel drawn to communicate and enjoy one another. I love what I've done with this house, and what is still yet to be done. And I hate that she made me feel bad (yeah I know, people can't make you feel anything) about this place.

It's mine. I did this, and that's important.

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