I woke up twice last night, momentarily nudged out of my dreams to realize that I was very alone and very afraid. I wanted to reach across my bed and find my phone through the darkness and call someone, anyone, to make me feel safe again. But that little voice whispered, "You're a big girl now" and so I drew my covers up and snuggled my head against my pillows and not without a few tears sliding down my cheeks, I fell asleep.

I blame my dreams last night (mostly) for my strange bout with middle of the night fear. In my dreams I was surrounded by people, constantly moving from one group to another. There was a lot of laughter and fun and shared happiness ... and then when I woke, just darkness.

And I just don't like my empty bed. I don't.

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