10.23.2002

I feel like less of a woman, like I'm going to have to give up the things that make me a girl, like I'm suddenly sexless, ugly, and very very vulnerable.
I feel like the possibility of ever having Hope and decorating a nursery in Alice or Raggedy-Ann or anything white and frilly has completely disappeared.
I feel like this is all my doctor's fault, letting me take hormones that fed the nasty things inside me.
I feel used and wasted, and most of all, very very sad.

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