Thank you, financial aid, for finally showing up. I am now registered for next semester and I was able to find enough classes online to make it worth it. I only have to go to lab twice a week on campus and I managed to find one during my lunch hour. So yes, I am going to be positively mad next semester but I am continuing on with my education, no matter what.
And by the way? Straight A's this semester. Imagine that. Considering the many times I almost dropped the classes, cried while I tried to write essays, and generally felt unable to cope ... this is a big accomplishment for me.
Oh ... and it's official (again? still?). There is quite possibly nothing I would rather do than teach. I think I've found it doesn't even matter what I am teaching or what age, even. This morning as I played a game with one of my music classes (I would tell you the name of the game, but I made it up and uhm, it doesn't seem to have one. It involves singing and something along the lines of Simon Says, though. I guess you had to be there.), I couldn't help but notice how each and every one of them had their eyes locked on my face. And they are so full of innocence and love and pure delight in life it made me want to cry. The sounds of their laughter and the expressions on their faces as we fell to the floor in a giant mix of legs and arms and giggles made me feel alive.
Remember when I said I want great beauty? I already had it. And I didn't even know.